I got into bed at 9 PM last night and fell asleep reading before 10. I woke this morning to my mom’s phone call at 10:11 AM. My level of exhaustion is obvious; what is telling is my ability to sleep that much when I’m as distracted as I am. It’s been about, oh, ten years since I was this distracted, and then I would lie awake nights, obsessing and tossing and turning. I like to think it’s a sign of age and maturity that I am fully aware that I need sleep to make anything good happen in my life.<\/p>\n
I’m covered in scratches, bites, and bruises, not unlike I used to be when I was dancing in a show. The mosquitoes got me on the hill during a night of stargazing, the bruises from a bad fall just as the reception began… and from the softball game… and the cuts and scratches are from dancing all night. My shoes for the wedding hurt the moment I put them on, but a few glasses of wine and I was swing dancing all night. Oh, what fun.<\/p>\n
It’s amazing the perspective just a few hours can give you. I was so incredibly emotional and distraught this morning, sad that the wedding was over and that the camaraderie I found might be gone, but tonight I’m considerably better. I saw Kent, Lucas and Sean Patrick in the city before they left, and we saw Pirates of the Carribean again, which will put any red-blooded American girl in better spirits.<\/p>\n
Ian and Tessa are gone on their honeymoon, mom might be leaving tomorrow, Kent and fam and my dad are long gone… I feel so lost and so blessed at the same time to have the family I do. One of the things that’s always baffled me about the posity of good men in my life, that is, outside my family, is how much I have to offer them by way of family. I have a few other good things to offer as well, but I also have my family who, if he’s a good guy, will love him dearly forever. I have time in Napa with my Dad and Carole to offer. drinking wine, talking into the night, loving and discovering life with them. I have a life full of my mom’s mess and magic and music, her absurdity and generousity and willingness to adopt those who love her kids, her talent and goodness and orange rolls. I have four brothers, all of them brilliant and brave, none of them willing to put up with a schmuck. And, well, me. There’s me. I’ve got that too. But I guess it would have to be a pretty incredible, transcendent, wonder-full guy who could fit into this clan. I wonder if he’s out there.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I got into bed at 9 PM last night and fell asleep reading before 10. I woke this morning to my mom’s phone call at 10:11 AM. My level of exhaustion is obvious; what is telling is my ability to sleep that much when I’m as distracted as I am. It’s been about, oh, ten […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-366","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/366","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=366"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/366\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=366"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=366"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mlwms.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=366"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}