Posted January 23rd, 2003 by Michelle

I understand that it’s January in New York, but in my opinion, this weather is ridiculous. Not to talk about the weather, but when it is so cold that it affects every waking (and many sleeping) moment of your life, you can’t help but think about it, talk about it, dream of May.

Last year on May 11th, my brother Sean’s birthday, about twenty of us met in Sheep’s Meadow in Central Park. We threw frisbees and ate Doritos and got sunburned. I was two weeks away from my EMT finals, had my requisite crush on an unavailable tattooed man, and was looking forward to a long, hot summer. But a month later, I got my first job as an EMT, as the medic on a trek for National Geographic. We started in Glacier National Park, and while the days could sometimes be warm, for the most part it was really, really cold. I slept in what was supposed to be a zero degeee bag, but every night for two months I slipped on long underwear, pants, a sweater, jacket, hat AND gloves before burrowing into my sleeping bag. By the time I got back to New York, the last warm day was gone and it was immediately the cool side of fall.

I am looking forward to summer. I want it to be so hot that my forearms sweat when I’m sitting reading a book. I want it to be so hot that I yet again swear I won’t make it another summer without chopping off all of my hair. I want it to be so hot that everyone avoids the sunny side of the street.

As it is, I’ll have to find a few more blankets before I climb up to my loft to sleep tonight.

Beyond the weather… I’m struggling right now, trying to find a balance in my life between what I want to do and what I need to do. A very smart man recently told me to ask for what I want, but my question is, ask who? So. This is what I want. I want to make my living singing and writing. I want to go to yoga five times a week. I want to work as an EMT. I want to have enough money to travel. And I want the King of Men to knock on my door.

And for a heat wave to warm up my city.